When I was pregnant with my son two years ago, I decided I was finally going to write a novel. I did it. It took me three months to write the bulk of the story, but the end just wasn't coming to me. For a year, I'd write a chapter here, delete a chapter there, and edit my grammar mistakes. I still wasn't ready to write the end. Finally, this year I felt inspired to finish my novel. Publishing still feels like an impossibility, as I have zero experience with the publishing world, but I finished writing it. Of course, when I say I finished, I mean it has a beginning, middle, and end. I don't know if I'll ever feel like it is ready to send off to the professionals.
I was talking to one of my students on Friday about his plans after graduation. He's a big-time reader. In one semester I've seen him go through Donita Paul's Dragon Quest Series, Suzanne Collins Hunger Games, Cassandra Clare's City of Ember books, and various other stand alone novels. Every moment he gets, he's reading. I know his plans are to go into the Marines, which is certainly a worthy calling. Still, I want him to inspire future boys to enjoy reading just for the love of it. A male English teacher can be so inspiring to young boys. I want him for the literacy field. I decided to plead my case.
When I asked this student if he'd consider going to college after his time in the military, he said he hadn't even thought about it. Of course, I encouraged him to enroll and told him I thought he'd make an excellent English teacher. He told me he hated school, and could never see himself telling someone their grammar sucked or they didn't answer correctly on a multiple-choice test. I told him the literacy field is changing, and he can help make it what it should be- a celebration of reading and writing. This teenager told me he had thought about writing a novel one day, but he didn't have confidence in himself. He didn't do a good job with essays, so he probably wouldn't be any good at it. I told him I know how he feels.
I told him about my struggles with my novel, and how I just wasn't sure it was good enough- I wasn't sure I was good enough. I felt extremely uncomfortable baring my soul, and admiting my weakness. But, during the last National Writing Project meeting, I promised myself I'd be open about my own writing with my students. As I waited for his reply, he looked at me very seriously and asked what my book was about. At this point the other two students in the class were keyed into our conversation. I described my tale of a half-angel boy and his struggle with making meaning out of his life. I was greeted with a resounding chorus of "We want to read it!", "Wait! Stop! Don't tell us so much!", "If we get done with our projects really quickly, could we see the advanced copy?"
I hadn't intended for them to REALLY read it. My intention was to encourage this young man to write. But, when I looked at the excitement in their eyes, I knew this was a unique opportunity. Here were student volunteering to read and edit a 300 page unrefined novel. They were begging to help, wanting to do something that they perceived as important. Imagine that. Without my even meaning to, I got three teenagers excited about doing extra work. Because they think it is important, I feel myself rededicated toward my novel. But, I also feel like I can't miss an opportunity to encourage students to enjoy reading and writing.
Letting students read my unpolished, unpublished fantasy world is scary. What if they don't like it? What if writing it was a waste of time? On the other side of the coin, what if they love it? Then, I have no choice but to put it out there for the pros. I'm not sure how to feel about others readiny my novel, but I'm happy to give students motivation to finish their projects and ask for something other than a movie to close out the year. I'm interested to see how this goes.
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